“If we could get your
subconscious mind to agree with your conscious mind about being happy, that's
when your positive thoughts work.” Bruce
Lipton
Given that happiness has a direct link
to depression, it is therefore important to understand how the thinking mind may affect the mental state of happiness.
Generally speaking, the purpose of life and living is two-fold: to
enjoy life, and to expand happiness.
But how can one enjoy life if one is not happy by nature, or how
can one expand happiness if one has no idea what happiness is all about?
Therefore, it is critically important, first and foremost, to understand how the thinking mind works,
and how it can make you happy or unhappy over the long haul.
The Happiness Myths
Happiness is only
an abstraction, a far-fetched thought that is often elusive and evasive; it is
difficult not only to define but also to understand. To further the
complication, happiness often creates certain misleading myths.
The myth: the happiness sources
It is always a myth
that abundant wealth, good health, and satisfying
relationships—what most people crave and pursue in their lives—will bring
them happiness. Abundant wealth, good health, and satisfying relationships are
only the byproducts of happiness; they do not cause or bring true and
lasting happiness in real life.
To illustrate, many
lottery winners attest to their experiences of temporary ecstatic happiness,
and nearly all winners confess that their winning has ultimately made them
miserable and unhappy for various reasons. Maybe once the initial stimulus of
sudden wealth and the drastic changes of lifestyle have worn off, they
ultimately return to their original baseline level of happiness or unhappiness.
Or, maybe, according to some experts, having too much pleasure—what is known as
“eustress”—could also cause stress, just as lacking in pleasure might be
stressful to the many have-nots.
The myth: the
happiness effort
It is also a myth
that happiness is something that can be pursued with willpower and effort. The
Bible rightly says that pursuing happiness is just “like chasing the wind.” (Ecclesiastes 2:11)
Effort does not
necessarily bring happiness; it only creates the illusion of an
environment that is conducive to temporary happiness. To illustrate, one may
work diligently in one’s career to excel and to get to the top of the
profession only to find that one has a terminal illness, or has incurred a
debilitating accident. For example, Steve
Job, the co-founder of Apple computers, had his life cut short by
pancreatic cancer at the height of his successful business career.
Pursuing happiness
may be only a fantasy fueled by temporary moments of happiness, because aging,
illnesses, misfortunes, and ultimately death plague all alike; in other words, impermanence
cuts short all human efforts and endeavors to bring happiness. We are all aware
of the fact that impermanence is an ultimate leveler of everybody and
everything, but many of us still choose to delude ourselves into thinking otherwise.
Denial only fosters the myth that if there is a will there must be a way to
attaining happiness, and that all it requires is the human effort to make any
dream come true.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
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