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Saturday, November 18, 2023

"Failing Well" Is Your Freedom


Failing to achieve anything you have set your mind on doing is a setback on your developing mind. Unfortunately, this is not uncommon in any teenager.

For example, dating with someone for the first time seems mutually satisfying. You expect that someone will respond to your phone call the next day, but that does not happen. You feel disappointed, with feelings of regret, remorse, and wishful thinking—they may even become memories haunting you in the days to come.

A poor academic score or loss in a game or a sport competition are examples of frustration and disappointment due to unfulfilled expectations.

Failing can lead to low self-esteem and loss of self-belief.


Failing is part and parcel of growing up. “Failure deprivation” does not give you the resilience to confront other challenges later in life. The reality is that you must learn to accept it, learn valuable lessons from it, and then do it again or explore new options. Always keep on doing and persist in your doing.

“Failing well” makes you understand and recognize your own imperfections that everybody has, and then thrive and be happy to find your success in your failure.


Any attachment to memories of failing will lead to anxiety and fear of failure, and even depression.

To get out of your bondage, stop comparing yourself with others or with your own past.

Also, remember this ancient Chinese wisdom: “No expectation, no disappointment.”  Expectation is your assumptive prediction of what will happen. Your assumptive mind processes your memories and then projects them into the future as “predictable realities.”  But tomorrow is another day, and nothing is predictable.

The bottom line: Just do what you can with what you have but with no expectation.

FREEDOM with BONDAGE shows you how to free yourself from your bondage to the flesh that gives you the "freedom" to make the wrong choices and decisions in your everyday life.

Stephen Lau

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

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